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WOMEN & WORK

Kelly11

POSTED: Mon, 12/27/2010 - 2:29pm

Do you suppose one day?

As Mireille continues to expand her brand she will offer one day an arrangement like so many other Personal Trainers do, where you can pay like 100.00 US or so for a 30 minute phone conversation? I think the people who used to work for her were so lucky...it is my understanding there were many of the three "C's....

snorklee

POSTED: Sat, 10/22/2011 - 11:42pm GOT A NEW JOB!!! Finally! I found out last night!!! Got a great job. I can't wait to start!!! I'll be working for a fortune 500 insurance company doing telephone triage, and the greatest part is.... I can work from home, eventually... after my training! Woot!!!! And during training, I get to wear big girl clothes, not a uniform! The job pays well, and there is a lot of room for moving up when the time is right. But the best part is when I can work from home. I'll never have to drive in a blizzard again. I am so excited to start this new journey... But... I'm also sad to be leaving my old job... even though I've complained long and loud about the stress. The women I've worked with this past 7 years have been phenomenal, and I will miss them all. It's bittersweet, of course. I knew it would be. But, also, it's time to put aside the stress and the oncall and all the other things that have made me so strung out and unhappy. I've got to move to the next phase of my life. Wish me well.

Marilyn

POSTED: Tue, 10/25/2011 - 10:33am Wow Deb That is brilliant news. I hope the new job is everything you hope for. I am excited for you. Take care and bon chance!!

miamoki

POSTED: Mon, 10/24/2011 - 12:53am AWESOME!! I'm SO happy for you!! It really is true - everything happens for a reason :) YAY!! As for your old co-workers - why not talk to them before you leave and say Hey I'm really going to miss you, get their phone numbers and meet them for lunch sometime? There's no rule that says you can't still stay in touch with them!

kit

POSTED: Sun, 10/23/2011 - 7:10pm Way to go Deb!!! Congrats on the new job, you did it!! Sounds ideal for your needs. Bet you look tres chic and French in your "big girl" attire. Change is difficult and I know you think you are somehow being "abrupt" giving "only" 3 weeks notice. As I recall you got zero notice when they called you in to the office to "discuss" your new duties. Of course I sympathize with the fact that it IS hard to say good-bye to really great co-workers. But you need to consider the stress and gut-wrenching pressure your soon-to-be former bosses placed on you. You are to be commended in achieving a safer,saner work environment. I wish you loads of luck on your new venture. xo Tina

Vintage1944

POSTED: Sun, 10/23/2011 - 12:03am Here's the answers to my question That is fab.Change is bittersweet.You will be fine.oxo

Lorrie43

POSTED: Mon, 09/19/2011 - 1:41pm Response for Snorklee I usually don't post, but I do read the responses. You probably have been a registered nurse for a long time it seems with your experience compared to my 11 years as a registered nurse. After eight years of nursing on a floor that was very stressful, I was burned out, having panic attacks the night before my shift. I did not realize it until after I left, I had PTSD. When the job is stressing you out like that, it is not worth it. Sometimes it is a sign to move on to something else for your well being. You have to ask yourself if the money is worth that much or can lifestyle changes be made. From one nurse to another I wish you the best in whatever you do.

snorklee

POSTED: Sun, 09/25/2011 - 8:24am Burn out Hi Lorrie, I've only been a nurse for a little over 11 years too. Graduating class of 2000. :) I think I am burned out, but it's a management burn-out rather than a patient care burn-out. I was happy working the busy inpatient unit for 5 years. I would love to go back. My big issue with my job now is the on-call. It's round the clock, and I have to go in and work a shift if I can't find coverage. It goes something like this... "Hello. There's been a call-in for the 3-11 shift. Would you like to come in and work today? No? Okay. No problem. No... really, I understand... it's okay.... okay.... well.... I have to keep calling people, so take care... okay, you too. buh-bye." Multiply that times 30 phone calls, and every single person says no they can't work the shift. Then I have to stop what I'm doing on my day off and go in and work it. Like today. An RN called in sick, and found her own coverage, which is a good thing, except that she called in an LPN, and one of our patients has IV meds, and requires an RN. So. You guessed it. They called me this morning at 7 am, we couldn't find an RN with that kind of short notice. So, I'm on my way in on this beautiful sunny Sunday morning, to work, to cover the LPN. ~sigh~ I need to find a new job.

Marilyn

POSTED: Sun, 09/25/2011 - 12:58pm Burn out Deb, please take care of yourself, I fear for your health with this schedule. You are important to your family and to us so please, please, try to find a new job. Easier said than done I know but sending good vibes your way. Take care, xxx

snorklee

POSTED: Mon, 09/26/2011 - 7:47am Interview this morning :) I'm keeping my fingers crossed. It's for an assistant director for a long term facility for retired nuns. I've seen the building, it's brand new and breathtakingly beautiful. Wish me luck! :)

kit	POSTED: Tue, 09/27/2011 - 7:13pm You are being wished... All the luck in the world!! Your "old" job was abusing you! Keep us posted. xo Tina

Marilyn

POSTED: Mon, 09/26/2011 - 2:32pm Interview I hope all went well, everything crossed that you now have a new job.

Vintage1944

POSTED: Mon, 09/26/2011 - 9:25am Good luck!!!!! Fingers crossed my dear Deb.Let us know asap how it goes.OXO

snorklee

POSTED: Tue, 09/27/2011 - 11:10pm Thank you... Jean. Marilyn and Tina, I really liked the place. It was so peaceful and serene, and beautiful. It's a brand new retirement home for nuns. I really felt like I belong there, I went for an assistant director of nursing position. I thought it was full-time, but it was only supposed to be a part-time position. It was also a newly created position as well. The woman who interviewed me was willing to make it full-time to accommodate me. We hit it off really well, and I would be her assistant if I get the job. The only drawback was that it pays a full third less than I make now, and does not have a family plan for insurance. Also it does not have provisions for a 401K. So... long story short... I don't think I can accept the position. :( drat! But I'm holding a space in the universe for it. If it's meant to be, then the money part will work out. Meanwhile, I'm keeping my options open for something else to come along. I just feel like the time is right for something... anything.... to open up. We'll see, I guess.

Vintage1944

POSTED: Sun, 09/25/2011 - 8:49am Burn Out It comes in many forms and disguises.Your on call schedule is brutal and might be illegal.And middle management is an awful position.The right job will come up.In the meantime the candle is lit for you.OXO

snorklee

POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 10:01am What I wouldn't give for 30 minutes What I wouldn't give for 30 minutes of Mireille's time right now. I've done the unthinkable at work. After two years of unbelievable stress, being on call 24/7 365 days a year, etc., etc., They wanted me to expand my role as a clinical manager to "on-site" manager, in charge of not only a busy unit, but the entire building including maintenance and security. The way they announced it to me was that I found the security guards timecards on my desk on payroll day this Monday. I don't know what happened to me this week, but I had a massive melt down and freak-out fit on my boss, who is really a very nice woman. I went all the way up to HR, I invoked my wrath on the CEO (ack!) I boldly refused to take on the responsibility... totally out of character for meek, mild little doormat me. I was a raving, shrieking lunatic. And somewhere in my bravado, I shot my career in the foot, and killed my integrity, and lost any respect that anyone ever showed me. They have circled their wagons, and I am being forced next week to take the new responsibility, plus I'm to be counseled on how to manage my time more effectively. Somehow, I think that if I had had 30 minutes with Mireille, before I jumped off the sanity wagon, that things might have turned out better. :(

jas

POSTED: Wed, 09/21/2011 - 8:44am Can we back up here? I don't know, and here goes...Deb, I hear you deeply in my soul. The stress, the pressure, the more, more and then more. I'm living it too, only I own my own business so I can't really blame it on anyone. We live in disconnected world, we've lost touch with a natural, healthy way of living. What you are going through, what I am going through is a much bigger picture. It may be your boss doesn't have any control of it. She may be doing the best she can. So is there another way? Is there a different road? Us vs them isn't working. We are all in this together. We are all part of a world where "busy" is our first name. How can we create sanity together?

snorklee

POSTED: Mon, 09/26/2011 - 8:01am Jas, I totally agree... To be truly happy, our work has to resonate with our authentic self. When it doesn't, it causes stress on many levels, and our well-being suffers. I don't know what would resonate with my authentic self, except maybe living in Rockport, Massachusetts, overlooking the ocean, and supporting myself by writing, which, in my heart of hearts is what I have always wanted to do. The disconnect comes when we have to do a job for money, because we need to pay our bills, and support ourselves. It's not easy to find a job that supports us and nourishes our authentic selves. My boss and I are back to a good working relationship, unbelievably. She really is a fair person, and she is in the same boat as I am, being pushed from above. I've apologized to her for my rant last week. She is someone who looks at the whole situation fairly, and in my case, luckily, she did do that. I've thought a lot about your post, and I think that creating sanity for me is to gather my scattered energy back to myself, filtering out the negative, so that all that I have around me is my positive lifeforce. I have found that when I do that, I can live in the moment, and the answers come much easier. Most of my stress comes from worrying about what I've already done, or what is going to happen in the future. When I focus on only the moment at hand, the stress falls away. The hard part for me is remembering that. :)

miamoki

POSTED: Tue, 09/20/2011 - 12:18am My heart goes out to you my friend :) I think you did the right thing. I did the very same thing one day at work and I kept my job. The difference is though I worked for the government, so it's very difficult for them to fire you but they did fire quite a few when I was there. I believe that you have to stand your ground, no matter how unpopular it makes you. My situation was similar - I was completely stressed out and had a newborn to boot and hadn't slept in weeks. I completely lost it with my boss. I later apologized and told him why I lost it. He still wasn't happy but he did respect me after that. Your boss on the other hand, KNEW it was coming and did absolutely nothing to warn you. She completely allowed them to blindside you with it and that's just not right. Everything happens for a reason and I think that this is a HUGE sign that it's time for you to move on. Life is too short. Don't stay there any longer than you absolutely have to (and we all understand having to keep your mouth shut temporarily to keep the bills paid)and move on! This could just be a blessing in disguise :)

meneia

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 7:02am This is clearly well outside This is clearly well outside of your job description. A discussion regarding additional compensation or some other kind of concession (like a less insane work schedule) in exchange for you taking on this additional responsibility is really a good idea. Go in calmly, and well prepared, and even though they probably won't give you anything (if it's anything like my company) then at least you will feel better for having said something, and then they will have heard your side of the story when you're being rational rather than emotional.

snorklee

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 12:42pm Compensation... or not. Hi Meneia, I did send an email to my boss, asking for a clear definition of what the new responsibilities would be, (because I still don't know), I asked that my job description be changed to reflect the additional jobs, and that I be compensated monetarily for it. It was at that point that my boss told me that I needed additional teaching on how to manage my time. So.... that's it in a nutshell. Now I'm definitely an unhappy employee, and they are just as unhappy with me.

kit	POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 2:47pm Oh, and by the way Deb, No, your boss is NOT really a very nice woman. She let them pull this %#@***! on you without warning.

Vintage1944

POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 10:45pm Right on Tina I could not agree more.Well said.OXO

Marilyn

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 5:07am Exactly If your boss had any 'niceness' about her she would have at least warned you that this was going to happen and given you chance to voice your opinion. This is tantamount to abuse in the workplace. If you have to cope with this additional responsibility you should be financially rewarded or given extra holidays with pay and not on call.

snorklee

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 12:49pm I agree... But I also realize that she is just as stuck as I am in this, because although she is over me, there are others over her, and we have undergone a change of CEO's recently. People have been let go across the board since the re-organization. This edict is coming from the new CEO, she told me that. So, she is in the same predicament, I think.

kit

POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 2:37pm Dear Deb, This so sounds like the shenanigans at my hospital job. Despite a union(take our pay, do little to defend working conditions), the management continues to heap on more and more. We basically do RN work without nurse aides which means we do their work too. I remember you were looking for other options. Any luck there? Are these new responsibilities going to come with a pay increase? If not I have to agree with Jean and Marilyn. I don't know your financial situation. I need to remain where I am financially. But I cut down to 2 days at the hospital(12 hour shifts) and I make sure I never or rarely work two in a row. I work 10 hours at my desk job either 1 or 2 days a week. It makes the whole job situation do-able. If you choose to stay, can you amend your hours, go part-time manager, part-time field nurse(patient care)or some other way to take the stress off. I personally believe(conspiracy theory here) that my bosses are trying to weed out us old-times.(highest paid)That way they can keep the younger, stronger, cheaper staff. Either way, I wish you luck. Any chance of leaving that organization and going back to patient care solely? No more on call b.s. I'm sure Mireille would tell you to treat yourself well. Melt-down, schmelt-down, you had every right.You did NOT lose respect, you spoke up for YOU! And it sounds like it was high time someone did. The "for the little ones inside" site I read is all about speaking up for ourselves, telling others what WE need. I am thinking of you and hoping the right solution to your problem will present itself. Hugs, Tina

snorklee

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 1:07pm Goes with the territory... Hi Tina, I think that this is the nature of our profession. So much stress for such a long time, leads to big blow-outs which don't really help or change things. My financial situation is like yours in that I need my job. I'm divorced with a mortgage, and bills that must be paid. So I don't have the flexibility to walk off the job. But, I will start looking immediately for another position. I like your idea of going back to patient care. I miss it anyway, and no more on-call would be heaven. Thank you so much for your good ideas and support. We nurses have to stick together. :)

kit

POSTED: Wed, 09/21/2011 - 12:54am I'm definitely there for you... I'm glad to know you are looking elsewhere, and I know it's hard to even think about "starting over". But sounds like you are handling this well. Yes, stay there for now but with the knowledge it's temporary. I've had a couple of my own melt-downs over the years--comes from being told you're a "professional", but in reality, treated like a drone. This week I'm being forced (letter from the DON stated I've been personally selected,HA!)to attend three 4 hour, mandatory courses on how to transition from rhetoric to reality, to be a true professional, not just task-oriented. Really? Most of the time I'm glad I can squeeze in lunch. They're all the same but some are worse, like your company. I love the idea that somehow YOU don't manage your time well, which couldn't be further from the truth. The home health company I work for has a large hospice dept as do many others. It's patient care, doing the wonderful service you do for those at the end of life. I signed onto a site called Careerbuilders.com and get listings of jobs in my area without having to get calls from recruiters. I'm thinking of you and hope the right change comes your way soon. xo

Vintage1944

POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 12:49pm DEB!!! Please,please,please,run for the hills.I fear for you in this job.That is an insane expectation and handled very poorly by management.I am not surprised you blew your stack.They were and are disrespectful to you.And why are you beating yourself up for taking a stand?Perhaps,you might have been calmer in your approach;perhaps not....but you needed to say something.And they are forcing you to do the job.Get out of there!!OXO

snorklee

POSTED: Sun, 09/18/2011 - 12:52pm Jean and Marilyn I am working on finding another job, which is unfortunate, because I had planned to retire with this company. But, I've gone as far as I can go, and I'm not willing to go any further with them. I'm a nurse. I can work anywhere. :)

Marilyn

POSTED: Sat, 09/17/2011 - 1:36pm Deb I agree with Jean on this one. They were lucky you didn't just walk out in anger. They should not be so disrespectful of you to just tell you of the changes in such a way without any previous discussion. Will they not sit down with you and have a rational debate about the problems within the job situation?

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